Let’s dive into some baby sensory stuff with mealtimes with our Occupational Therapist. But first, will all the moms whose babies hate getting their face wiped after mealtimes, please stand up?!

I am right there with you. Between navigating baby led weaning, letting baby be independent and messy when starting solids, and cleaning up the floor- we have enough to handle during mealtimes. There is nothing worse than wrapping up a perfectly positive and happy mealtime with the face turning, scream provoking, and sometimes tear jerking face wiping. Here's some peace of mind- you are not alone. In fact, it is perfectly normal for babies to experience discomfort with getting their face wiped early on in their feeding journey. Let’s dive into the why and how.

Baby’s Sensory System

Let’s talk sensory for a minute and think about it from our little one’s point of view. (So imagine you are a baby sitting in the high chair.) Baby is sitting there eating their food at a mealtime that they are mostly in control of. Baby is either picking up their own food/utensils and bringing them to their mouth or the caregiver is bringing a spoon close to their mouth and they are choosing to lean forward with an open mouth to accept and eat the food off of the utensil. Again- baby is in control. But all of a sudden they lose that control at the end of the meal! Sometimes out of nowhere, a damp, rough cloth comes charging at baby’s face, and baby feels a bit forced or startled by this new sensory experience that they are no longer in charge of. So, it makes sense that their initial response may be to back away, cry, scream, or push the caregiver’s hand away.

Baby Routines and Transitions

As adults, we know that wiping our hands and mouth is an appropriate final step to mealtimes. Our body is ready for that sensory input and we know how to regulate the force so we aren’t wiping our faces too hard or too soft. Well, our little ones are still learning all of the routines that go with mealtimes, so, like everything else, we need to help teach them about face wiping as being the final step to a meal so they begin to anticipate it.

But even after a well established routine, our little ones still often struggle with transitions (moving from one activity to another). Again, let’s put ourselves in their shoes. As adults, we know that as the plate or bowl becomes empty, then the meal time will be over. We also are generally aware of what will happen after the meal time (we might transition to play, read, go outside, or get ready for bed, etc.). Our little ones have no idea what is coming next, and that can feel scary. They are only able to live in the moment, so if they are having a generally pleasant mealtime, it might be hard for them to deal with the fact that the moment is over and they don’t know what is going to come next. But, that’s okay! We can help them with that.

How to Make Cleaning Baby Up More Enjoyable

Let them know! Get rid of the element of surprise. Our little ones are smart and can catch on to routines and words quickly when they are repeated, so let your little one know you are planning on coming in to wipe their face. Make up a little phrase or jingle to say/sing as before you wipe their face so they know what is about to happen every time they hear the phrase/jingle. (“It is time to clean our hands, clean our hands, clean our hands…”) It is much easier for them to prepare for the contact, when they know something is coming.
Let them lead! Start by modeling wiping your own face first, then hand the wipe over to your little one to see if they try to wipe their face. Do this a couple of times back and forth before you go in for the final time to wipe all the remaining food off of their face. This will help your little one explore the sensory elements (texture, temperate, force) of the cloth in their owns hands before it touches their face.
Tell them what's coming next! Remember that they have no idea what the plan is after the meal is over, so as they are working on their last bites, talk to them about what is coming next. “When we are finished eating we are going to wipe our face and hands, then go outside! Doesn’t that sound like fun?!” Babies and toddlers are so smart and like to know what is about to happen. Include them in on the game plan!
Show them! Get out a hand held mirror and show them how messy their face is and what exactly you are doing when you are wiping their face! This is a learning experience for them too and we all learn better when we can see an understand what the heck is going on.
Achoo Game. Practice putting a damp cloth on babies head/face outside of mealtimes. One of my favorites is the “achoo” game. Just take turns putting the damp cloth on your head, and ACHOO it off. This is a great activity for the bath! Little games like this can help your little one’s sensory system learn to adjust to the texture and feel of the damp cloth, so they are not so thrown off by the texture when they get their face wiped at the table.
Pretend face wipe after pretend meal times. Have a pretend picnic or tea party with your little one, and when you are finished ‘eating’ practice wiping each others faces, just like you would after a real mealtime. Again- this will help establish that routine of face wiping after eating, as well as working on exposing your little one to the sensory components in a fun and playful way.
Wipe stuffed animals/baby dolls mouths. Let your little one take a wash cloth around and wipe baby dolls or stuffed animals' mouths. Giving them control of the situation and being the ‘face wiper’ will help them to become more comfortable and relaxed around face wiping in general because it is something they have done a bunch now, too!
Sensory input to mouth. Model bringing your hands to your own mouth to squish your own cheeks, run your finger up and down on your lips, or tap your whole hand on your mouth as you say “ahhh”. Encourage your little one to try and imitate you! All of these activities are a sneaky and fun way to practice providing the face and mouth with sensory input, which can help desensitize our kiddos faces and mouths to face wiping.

They Won’t Hate Face Wiping Forever

At the end of the day, just take a deep breath and try to be patient with your little one. Remember, they only started eating a few days/weeks/months ago, so this face wiping thing is very new and invasive to them. Trying to slow down during mealtimes and playtimes to help teach and encourage exploration of face wiping will help give your little one the guidance and confidence they need to tackle the situation at meal times. You got this!